So, life is really great here. The girls are great. I am great. We're all happy. Claire is adjusting SO WELL to all the changes in her life, and Anna is letting us sleep at night, so that makes me even more happy! The only thing I'm not happy about (and had the break down last week to prove it!) is that my time home with my two girls is quickly, and I mean very quickly coming to an end.
I have to go back to work before the typical 6-week time frame. I will go back to work when Anna is just 5-weeks old. This makes me so sad. (Ok, let's face it, the end of summer makes me sad, so obviously going back to work, leaving my girls, is going to make me sad!) Unfortunately, the details of my leave were not shared with me prior to last week. I basically had to dig (hard) to get answers to all of my questions. The bottom line is this...I didn't have enough sick days saved up for the typical 6-weeks, so that would mean days without pay. I didn't know just how much that would be. Well...it's a lot. $222 a day, a lot. That's huge to our family. I know that makes it sound like we're unprepared financially, for a second child....but let's face it, are you every REALLY prepared for any kids?! Even though we've saved, and we have a budget, it just doesn't make sense to not earn a pay check. It was a REALLY REALLY hard choice for me. I would never even go back to work, if that were an option, but it's not, so I guess going back one week early is not that big of a deal. Last week, however, during my emotional break down, I thought of a little puppy who isn't even taken away from his mommy until he's 8-weeks old, but women in this country aren't offered any guaranteed paid leave unless they have the time, or their company offers it. Sad. It's sad.
I know what you're thinking....it will be ok. I know, I know... But does anyone really want to hear that in the middle of their rant?! My mom will be traveling down to stay with the girls for the week I go back. (Thank the good Lord for retirement, right?!) It will be nice that I don't have to worry about them for my first week back. And then of course, she'll leave and things will get real again! Real like up and at 'em getting two kids out the door! I know we'll be fine, it always sounds scarier than it actually is.
So that's it. I'm enjoying every single last minute at home with my girls. Let's be honest, sometimes I want to have a glass of wine at one in the afternoon, but I wouldn't trade these 5-weeks for anything. I am truly blessed to have been home this long. If there was one thing I learned from when Claire was a little baby, it's that I need to enjoy Anna's first several months because they change and grow SO fast. I can't even think about how fast kindergarten will come...phew! Even though there are times I feel like pulling my hair out, because one kid is crying and the other needs to eat lunch, or go potty, or a combination of 50 million other things, I know that too soon these super fun days of having a 22 month old and a new baby will be gone, and I'll be left thinking about all the fun we had, not about the toys on the living room floor, the laundry that needs to be done, or the semi-crummy dinners that were served, because at the exact time I want to cook, Anna is screaming and Claire is climbing on the stool to help, grabbing at everything in her path! Let's face it...I'm pretty sure no one thinks about those things when thinking about the past when it comes to their kids.
I promised myself I was only going to be upset about having to go back early for one day (which was last week during my breakdown!) and to be perfectly honest, I have not thought negatively about it once since then. It will be ok, and I know just how blessed I am.
A few more photos, also courtesy of Jillian Green Photography.
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